Poetry‎ > ‎Reflector on the Post‎ > ‎

Chiclets Asunder

Saint Paul, 7 September 2003

Nobody wants crooked teeth or a blown o-ring
But should I trust my child’s mouth to
The Chiclets Asunder Orthodontists or
Should I allow my government’s space program to
Procure from The Budget O-Rings Company?

No one wants to play chicken with safety
But should I trust my final sky-diving jump to
The Psychotic Parachute Packers Union or
Should I allow my highway department to
Buy from The Thelma & Louise Guardrail Company?

Nobody wants an uncredentialed quack for primary care
But should I confide my most private thoughts to
The Straight-Jacket Psychotherapists LLC or
Should I allow my father-in-law’s plumbing to
Be examined by The Crackpot Urologists Group?

No one seeks blatant professional mediocrity
But should my property line be measured by
The Dang-Near Bang-On Surveyors Incorporated or
Should I allow my country’s future aggression to
Be underwritten by Napalm Fire Insurance Limited?

Nobody seeks joy in the roulette of uncertainty
But should our genetic seeds be randomly yanked by
Naked-Eye Integrity Prophylactics Incorporated or
Should I allow my friend and neighbors to continue to
Buy lottery tickets at the Face Mask Convenience Store?

Notes:
Chiclets are pieces of gum that approximate the rectangular size
of one's top front teeth.